Monthly Archives: February 2016

As a child, I Wanted to be a Mermaid

Growing up, I always wanted to be a mermaid. I think a lot of children have the same wish. I believed firmly that “mermaid” was an occupation that I could be, once I was old enough. I imagined of eventually … Continue reading

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My girlfriend was drowned last week

Yesenia liked to sleep around before we met No. That’s not true. That’s not how she told it. She said “I liked to fuck around.” She said she never really romanticized the idea — that she was never taught that … Continue reading

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I used to be a Cat Person

I thought I was a cat person, until I actually got a cat for myself. Charlie the tabby was special. First off, she was a girl cat with a boy’s name. I’m not sure why I gave her a boy’s … Continue reading

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I Couldn’t Afford a Tattoo, So I Found Someone Who Would Do It For Free.

I turned eighteen this year- in May, the month that I graduated high school. By coincidence, the majority of my friends turned eighteen about that time. All throughout high school we had celebrated “Birthday Month”, a time where one of … Continue reading

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My daughter’s annoying habit

“Fuck!” I cut myself again on a damn broken plate. Violet keeps littering the floor of her bedroom with broken glass. I’ve cut myself over a dozen times already. She does it every night and it’s incredibly annoying. Otherwise she’s … Continue reading

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Ten Days, Ten Pills

Day 1 I’m trying a new medication. My doctor recommended it. Said it would help with things. It’s a new drug, still in the testing phase, so they’re putting me on a ten day trial. Minimal side effects. Really no … Continue reading

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Mr. Grabs

Mr. Grabs’ house was at the dead end of Alexander Lane. There was nothing weird or off about it from the outside. All of the haunted houses in movies are dilapidated or covered in cobwebs. But Mr. Grabs’ house was … Continue reading

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I’ve been a professional contract killer for forty years. Want to know why I quit?

“In today’s fragile economy, earning a living wage is murder, so why can’t murder earn you a living wage?” For the past 40 years, I’ve been a professional contract killer – and a damn good one at that, perhaps even … Continue reading

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Why I am anti-bullying

Like everyone else in school, I was not friends with Melanie. Melanie smelled like fish. Not just a small fishy aroma – Melanie stunk of week-old carp left in the sun. Plus she had an appearance to match her disgusting … Continue reading

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An Open Letter to the Woman at Walmart

Open Letter to the Woman at Walmart: I saw you when I walked in. It looked like you had been there awhile. My cart was empty save for the soda I threw in as I walked by the sale right … Continue reading

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